If you're scoring along at home, in the barnyard scrap to be ruler of the Republicans it's:
Congressman Phil Gingrey (R- Coward): 0
GOP Chairman Michael "Balls Of Jell-O" Steele: 0
Radio host Rush Limbaugh: 2
I'm in Vegas, and they're picking favorites to be the next humiliated apologizer to Rush. There's a couple going on the board, here's the spread:
Governor of South Carolina Mark Sanford: 10:1
Blunder: Governor Sanford will call Rush and ask him to tone it down. "Rush, I love you, but you aren't responsible for that dilapidated school I'm running down in Dillon. I've got eighth graders writing letters to Obama and there's a lot of heat on me right now..."
Smack down: Rush will froth on air that "Mark Sanford is governor of a state with the third highest unemployment rate in the country. He talks a great game about refusing porkulus dollars, but then he turns right around and accepts the money like the hypocritical grand standing gas bag he is. If he would spend less time jawing about how the market creates jobs, and do something about it, he'd be a lot more credible." Rush will be correct.
Coming To Jesus: Sanford will stay up all night, shaking, as he crafts a press release using 38 of the 41 synonyms for "sorry" on Thesaurus.com.
Governor of Louisiana Bobby Jindal 2:1
Blunder: Bobby "Formerly Smartest Man In The Republican Party" Jindal is too smart to cross Rush. But red-faced after taking his advice to move waaaay right , expose the squander of volcano monitoring, lie about that boat story, and batter away at the folksy Reagan-esque folksiness during his infamous response to Obama speech, Jindal will not return Rush's call while he's at Disneyland.
Smack down: Limbaugh, privately red-faced by Jindal's Gomer Pyle act on national TV after pimping him as "the next Ronald Reagan", will take Jindal to the wood shed on-air by expanding his oeuvre of race based "Halfrican" style jokes to include Indian Americans.
Coming To Jesus: Jindal returns the fucking call.
Governor of Caliornia Arnold Schwarzzeneger 1:1
Blunder: Arnold will call the head of the Republican Party "irrelevant" on NBC's "Today" show.
Smack down: Limbaugh will take to the air saying "He obviously didn't have the leadership skills to articulate conservative principles and win over the public as Reagan did."
- What? Sorry, that was in 2007. Looks like Arnold was wrong.